Free Book Lesson's

This all started on trip to the mall yesterday. My friend and I did a little Christmas shopping and on the way out of the mall my friend had me run into a used book store so I could see how awesome it was {yes, a used book store can be awesome} I ran inside, looked around, confirmed the awesomness, and headed back to the car. On my way out of the store the coupon diva inside me had to look at the FREE book table, I mean they're free, I had to look. As I looked through this random pile of broken books and empty puzzle boxes I selected a book to entertain us for the day. My selection? The Making of an Unshakable Character By : an assortment of 12 people that have long names and I know you won't want this book so I'm not typing them all out. And side note : Shout out to Becca Langley, I have your book from 2002, why would you buy this?? Anyway, lets get started. The book begins with a quiz {clearly geared for younger readers, but we did it anyway} let's just say we didn't score all so well... Our results landed us in the "One Shaky Character" section {and for the record I did earn one more point than my friend, and by me pointing that out I am giving an example of my bad character...} In a nutshell the book is telling me that I think too much of what others think about me and my actions, and that I am not considering my daily life choices on a deeper level. Nicely played book, but I'm still not convinced my character is flawed, let's see what else you've got. Up next, if I continue down my path with this shaky character of mine I'm off on an "ignorant and uncaring journey" {harsh} Yet, if I decide to change {by reading this book of course} I will have "nothing to hide,nothing to prove, and walk with freedom and security" Well, personally I would call this being conceited. And if I have nothing to prove doesn't that mean I lack motivation in life?  Maybe it is good to walk around not being completely secure with my surroundings, people can be crazy...And lets be honest, we all have something to hide, even if it is small and insignificant to others, no one wants their whole life "out there" right ??! Well the book now tells me that my character tune up will require "daily attention" I'll give them 20 minutes.. . after scanning the first pages I reach the next chapter "Is my integrity worth 32 cents" yes, okay, skip that chapter. I'm doing great. The next Chapter that catches my eye? "Wipe the Poop off your Face" wow, I seriously couldn't make this up... is this really a book? I need to write a book... back to the poop on my face, apparently I need to see my anger and regret as poop, this poop is on my face {gross} now why would I want to walk around with poop on my face all day long? No one would like me, and I'd be in a bad mood. This is true, if I did have poop on my face I would be in a bad mood, and it would be in my best interest to wipe it off, but still, should this really be Chapter 16 in my character changing book{and did I need a book to know I don't want poop on my face?}I think not. I decide to stop reading there. I am sad for poor Becca, I really hope she didn't let this book convince her she was a bad person, because trust me, that first chapter is brutal, they make us "shaky character" people sound like a bad bunch{ judging by the sudden hault in highlighting she gave up on day five, so that speaks highly of her}. I think even a "self help" book, or whatever you would call this nonsense should focus on the helping part, we all know our flaws, no need to point them out, or make them up, and make them a billion times more awful sounding, geez.  So I'd say my free book is a fail, except I haven't yelled at a book this much, well, ever. It was that bad. I think I'll stick with my "shaky" character, I seem to be doing just fine, and somehow I have made it through life without  "poop on my face",  thank goodness. So next time you see some free books, grab one, maybe you'll find a good read, or maybe you'll find 12 people on a power trip who can't write, trying to tell you how to change your "shaky" life in for an unshakable fake one. You never know :)

Kelly Callahan

My Mommy Powers

Where do I start? We'll just start with how I got my title. I came home from the Children's Loony Bin {a.k.a Mc Donalds on a weekday when schools are out} And actually we'll pause here for a moment, I have some issues. So McDonalds is fast food right? I mean I know they aren't killing the chickens back there but come on.  Can someone please tell me why they are not expecting a lunch rush? Or why it takes them twenty minutes to get a happy meal and oatmeal on a tray? Oh wait, we had an apple juice too, that must be it.  And yes, I fought the urge to step behind the counter and get my own food from the little warming drawers. Ugh, anyway, back to the title, when I got home from the madness and watery oatmeal experience I was happy {at first} to see that my husband was home. I had left the house in more than a rush this morning to get Max to preschool and had not been home since, so  I was sure I'd come in to see something picked up, or maybe even some clean bottles { why I thought this is beyond me} I should've  known better just by the way my man had skillfully pulled into his spot in the driveway avoiding the trash cans that needed to be pulled in. So after I pull in the trash cans, get the mail, and wait for the dog to pee, I finally come inside to see the exact mess I left behind {duh} and where is my hubby? Nice and comfy watching TV on the couch waiting to head to the dentist. What I don't understand is how he can sit there and look at the mess without at least putting his dishes in the sink... I guess this is a guy thing, and I will never understand it. I am very different, give me ten minutes with a kid not pulling my leg or a baby on my boob and I will have this place looking pretty damn good. So what do I do? Well first I have to feed the baby, then I have to pump. While feeding my love I text my friend to ask her why it is only I know how to clean, this is when the light bulb came on, she was amazed I was not aware of my special powers to see what no one else can...now it all makes sense. I started thinking about it and you know what? I have a lot of powers. Not only can I see messes, I am the only one with the power to make them disappear. I am also the only one who can magically make a pile of dirty clothes clean and make them appear neatly folder or hanging {which ever you prefer} in the closet. I am also able to go to the grocery store and actually buy things that will produce meals, and on that note I also have the power to get dinner on the table and somehow to also make the kitchen look as if nothing happened. I can heal most boo boos with a hug and a kiss, I have answers for the hundreds of questions I am asked on a daily basis, and I sometimes even have enough power to shower and get out of my PJs {this last one is a hard power to master} My latest power is creating human life{round two}, and I am now also a cow, as I can be milked multiple times a day. And if I am sick? Don't worry, all of my powers seem to work just fine, they are sometimes slowed down, but amazingly things still get done.  I also have the power to function on very little sleep, and am on call {to anyone who I gave birth to} 24/7. My patience is not always up to par, and a good mood is not guaranteed, but my powers will be there, if I like it or not. My powers may not always be acknowledged, but do I care? No, I don't. Because I love being a Mom, and having my Mommy powers help me be a better Mom, and who doesn't need some special powers to help them get through the day?

Kelly Callahan

Instincts of a Pregnant Girl

Well I'm getting there... on Wednesday I will be 29 weeks along in my pregnancy. So far I have had a great pregnancy, just the usual pregnant girl complaints, sore back, don't like gaining weight, and anxiety over the new little girl about to enter our lives!

 While being pregnant many things have changed {duh} but the most interesting things I've noticed? I think while pregnant, women get some natural instincts back, now this may seem strange, but many can be compared to those of an animal. For example, whenever I open the turkey my dog is in the kitchen in two seconds flat, no matter where she is or what she is doing, why? Because her amazing sense of smell. Well, the other day I was on the couch fighting off this awful cold and all of the sudden knew my hubby was cutting into an avocado... it smelled awful! Now before I was pregnant I never even associated a certain smell to an avocado, but I sure do now, must be those natural instincts coming through and enhancing my senses. Not convinced? Well, pregnant women graze like cows {we do...we eat a little of everything...all the time}This is especially true the bigger we get since our tummies don't hold as much so we have to eat little meals throughout the day.  Our hair begins to grow in thick like many animals {only for us to shed this hair after the birth, lovely} We have a need for things to be clean {nesting anyone?} just like cats will clean themselves a million times, never feeling "clean". Ever notice how many spots your dog sleeps in every night? A pregnant girl finds it just as hard to get comfy as they do, we are changing positions constantly! Here's a good one, have you ever been calmly petting a cat and they just adore you, then a second later they are attacking you??? Well, you just had a crash course in pregnancy hormones...it's very true, us pregnant folks can be quite moody.

I think my Mother put it best, while we are pregnant we are back to basics, back to our instincts. And animals are always acting on instinct, okay maybe not always, if they are well trained, but they sure act on their instincts more frequently than not. So I'm not sure why I decided to compare myself to an animal, but it makes some sense, right?

Kelly Callahan

Almost lost it...

Well today was quite a day, and I know looking back that if I had come into the day with a better attitude I may not have ended up dragging a screaming child from Wal Mart.... but we'll get there. The morning started out average, snow was falling and I was getting the car warmed up for a trip to our friends house. We had a GREAT time at our friends house, don't get me wrong, but MY child was NOT listening to anything I was saying. This is not only frustrating, but embarrassing {even though my friends would never judge me, I would still like to have my child not try and destroy their home} after some much needed girl talk, and a LOT of telling Max "No" "you have to share" "don't touch that" "are you listening??" it was time to go. I was silly to do this but I needed to buy a gift for the little girl I used to watch. I am watching her on Saturday and wanted to have a Christmas present ready to go. Well.... that was a bad idea. The Target  trip turned into a Wal Mart trip since we drove by one on the way home, it started off with screaming because I told Max he couldn't have an Icee, {I see this is my fault for letting him have them all too often} once he recovered from that fit he found many more things to cry about, such as : the ball he couldn't have, the apple he couldn't eat, the gallon of ice cream I wouldn't buy, the barbie he couldn't open, and of course the popcorn tins that I would not let him use as drums. As I made it to the toy section I knew what I wanted and of course they were out... so being the person I am I decided to see what was in Clearance, these areas were a disaster, and I know not to expect much order around Christmas, but it was a MESS!! I found two things quickly as I chased Max through the store, but I did not know the prices, so when I got up to the register I very nicely asked the man if he could check the prices, "on both of these?" well yes, both please. He scanned the first one, stared at me and said "well do you want it?" I told him I wanted to know the price of the other one first, he was not pleased, but scanned it and told me the price. He was impatient as impatient can be {he was not the one with a three year old screaming at his leg} so I quickly picked a toy. After we checked out Max had another fit over the Icee... stupid Icee.  As I buckled him in he was screaming, so upset that he didn't get what he wanted. So what did I do? I calmly got in the car, put in my Carrie Underwood CD , turned it up, and sang along...he did not like this......It calmed me down though. Once we were home I  realized I didn't like my choice of presents, I was so rushed to decide I was now not so pleased with my decision,, so that was a wasted trip, and now I'll be going back {maybe if the guy didn't rush me, geez} I decided I better start dinner and did my best to ignore Max's whining.... I don't know what is up with him lately.... well, apparently the taco shells I bought were not fresh enough, so my hubby did not eat what I made, I won't go into detail about this, but I was not pleased. I ate my dinner, shells and all and went downstairs to try and end the day on a happy note with my little man. I turned up some music {this time with his approval} and we danced like crazy people, and it was fun. He then told me he was tired {wow} and I put him to bed, and for the first time all week he went right to sleep. I was still needing to blow off steam so I decided to pop in the insanity dvd my friend loaned me. I was determined, and amazingly I finished it!!! It was not pretty... but I did it, and it felt great. I took a cold shower after my workout... it was tough {the workout, not the shower}  I am feeling much better now, I know that I can handle whatever life throws at me, and if this week it is a fussy kid, then I will work through it. Maybe next week it will be too many flowers delivered, or too many prizes won.... you never know ;) For now I am going to pat myself on the back for getting through today without losing it, I almost did, but I pulled myself together just before the meltdown. Tomorrow is a new day with renewed patience, and I hope to have a great attitude that will get me through all of my holiday and daily stressers! 

Kelly Callahan

When It's Too Quiet

Yesterday my little man and I went to work as usual. We picked up the little girl we watch, and headed to her house. When we got there it was time for her to have her drum lesson{this is NOT the quiet part}, so while she was busy I decided to get her laundry started. I have Max come upstairs with me and have him play with the toys in her room while I grabbed her laundry and headed to the laundry room {only one door down from where I left little Max} While I was loading in her clothes my boss came around the corner and we started talking about what she should wear to dinner..... now, it is hard to just walk away when your boss is talking to you, but I should've when I had that feeling, the "it's too quiet, he's up to no good" feeling. But no, I was good and stayed to listen, while I secretly worried what he was up to in there. Once we decided on her eye shadow I was gone fast, and when I walked into the room I knew exactly why it was so quiet.... Max fed the turtle. Yes, the girl I watch has a turtle tank in her room,a big turtle tank, a turtle tank that was now filled with turtle food. As I walk further in I see that it is not only filling the tank, but it is all over the floor..... and he squirted in all of the water conditioner....uh oh. Wow, so I start by getting a big cup and taking out some water and then putting some fresh water in, we don't need a dead turtle. Then I venture to the kitchen to find my tool of choice. Perfect, a strainer. After about half an hour of straining through the big turtle tank I have most, most of the turtle food out{and one pissed off turtle}. Then it's onto the floor {thankfully the girl I watch was in her drum lesson, or she would've flipped out at Max for making a mess in her room} Now, I don't know if you've seen turtle food recently, but it is tiny little dots, very tiny. So tiny that even after gathering together what I can with my hand  there is plenty of little specks left trying to hide in the carpet. Now, Max does everything big, so when he makes a mess its a BIG mess, so we are talking a lot of little specks.... everywhere. So for the next thirty minutes I get to pick up little pieces of turtle food from the floor. As all of my frustrated cleaning is happening Max is happily piling up pillows and jumping on them on the other side of the room{ I try to have a little "talk" with him about how he could have hurt the turtle, but he's two and a half, so he didn't really catch on...but he said sorry, so that's a plus}. I am amazed that no one has witnessed our little disaster, which is best. My boss is not used to having a two year old around {her daughter is eight} so I think Max sometimes.... well, upsets her. So it is best that this little oopsie is between Max and I. I now know I need to trust my Mommy feelings and RUN when it is too quiet, run. 

Kelly Callahan

California or Bust

My little man and I had a great summer together, we worked way too many hours, didn't see our friends enough, and had next to no bedtime routine.....but yes, we still had fun. And we even got to see Daddy on the weekends he wasn't working.

Now that the summer is over it is time to look ahead  on the calendar, and guess what? It's almost October....no way....we are off to California in October. We leave REALLY soon to go to my brothers wedding and my mind is not working, okay, well its working, but I can't seem to start getting ready to go. And it's not just packing our bags, its packing the car that I need to plan for. Yes, we are driving. Why? Because I HATE flying, and would rather do a 19 hour road trip with an almost three year old then step foot on an airplane.

So where to start? Well I figure if I write about going maybe something will "click" in my head and I'll actually be able to come up with a plan. My ideas so far are to be super organized, which never hurts. I will make a bag for car toys, a bag for snacks, and put all the things we don't need while driving in the back. See, this doesn't sound too difficult, right? Well, I guess it isn't, I just need to start making my lists and then I'll feel better. I love making lists, and now that I have my mommy brain I need them more than ever to make sure I don't forget anything. As long as I pack my bridesmaid dress and shoes we'll be okay :)

My next challenge is to find my little mans wedding ensemble. It isn't as easy as I thought to find black pants, a white button up, and a grey tie, in a size 3T. But I am always up to a challenge so I will make it happen. Of course this was my goal this weekend......but that's okay, I'll get it done. I will. 

So in the hustle bustle of getting ready I am also becoming a germophobe.... I DO NOT want to have a sick little one on my 19 hour journey, so I will be avoiding a lot of things this week, including pools, the mall play area, and really anywhere swarming with children.  I just hope we can avoid germs for the next week. 

I also want to reserve a place for my little mans third birthday. I want to get this done before we leave because I would be kicking myself if the time slot we wanted was taken when we came home.  My hubby is picky about the Birthday time, he doesn't seem to care where it is or any other detail just wants it on a Saturday afternoon{as does everyone else}, and that's a good reason to reserve our spot early. I will love having the spot in place, but then there will be plenty of little details to work on once we are home.

I think I know why this trip is so hard to get my head around, we haven't been on a vacation in forever, I mean we go on little weekend getaways, but Max has never left the state! So this is a pretty big deal....yeah, there's my reason for being a scatter brain, perfect. 

I guess the closer the trip gets the more "real" it will be and I will kick my butt into gear and get us ready to go, and make sure the house is super clean, because no one wants to come home to a mess. I think it will be like when someone is coming over.... the night before you kick it into high gear and get everything clean and ready, because you realize it's your last chance. So I am sure I will amaze myself and somehow get it all done, hopefully in an organized fashion.

After my trip I have decided to go back to a challenge. I want to save extra money for the holidays, and hopefully another vacation, so I need to do some budgeting! I will be trying to convince my friend to do it with me {you know who you are ;)} So hopefully we can be "budget buddies" and be frugal together . Somehow I need to create a "challenge" to motivate myself, but as long as it has has a happy ending I don't mind how the story begins.

Kelly Callahan

The Other Half, And Me

I have a great job, so in no way am I complaining, but being a nanny for a wealthy little girl defiantly puts me in places I normally would not be. One of these places is the Denver Country Club, now there is nothing wrong with spending my workday swimming with my son and the girl I watch, but I would advise all nannies to avoid conversation with the "locals" there. For example.... this happened 4 years ago, but I still remember this lady, and to this day I avoid her evil stares. I was at the club swimming with the little girl I watch, Hannah {this was before Max was added to the picture} We were headed to order some lunch and she must have stepped on something sharp because all of the sudden her foot was bleeding. We were pretty close to the locker rooms so I rushed her that way to clean off her foot and inspect the damage. As I mentioned she was bleeding, so yes, I am sure she had left some little blood trails in the locker room {tile floor} as we came in. I sat her down and started cleaning off her foot. I could feel an evil stare and as I turned my head there it was, Barbie was mad, she looked at me with her very set expression and said "are you going to clean this up?" HA, what? I am trying to see if she is okay and find the source of bleeding and you are worried about the tile floor in this outdoor locker room??? That by the way I would expect to be much nicer for what you are paying each month. Well, yes, she did seem to expect an answer, so I said "No" plain and simple, I figured she'd understand, but no, she did not, she keeps staring and says "as her nanny it is your JOB to clean that up".... okay Barbie..... now, first off, you are just assuming I'm the nanny, second, I am sure the country club maid that I see in here like every hour will take care of this, now please leave me alone. After I had gotten a bandaid on Hannah's toe, I look to see these awful blood trails she must have made for Barbie to be so upset. Wow, next to nothing, little tiny toe prints of blood were dotted throughout the entrance of the locker room..... Barbie had left after I stayed silent long enough, but she was still at the pool, and oh did she have some looks to give me. So I am not saying that all these rich lady's are awful, but I am yet to have a friendly encounter with a lady at the club yet. More recently I was at the pool with Hannah and Max, Hannah was off at the high dive, and I was with Max in the baby pool, as Max was playing with his cars another little boy hopped in and along came his Grandma..... I knew this was a conversation I didn't want to have just looking at her outfit. She tried to smile as she asked how old Max was, I said two, she then asked me if I was his babysitter..... okay, side note, I am a nanny, I hate being called a babysitter, I'm not 16, and I'll be around for years. Anyway, after I tell her no , he is mine, she gives me a nasty look and with a nastier voice says " Aren't you a bit young?" The way she said it was so mean I was caught off guard and I was once again not able to come up with a clever comeback, so I just said "No" Her grandson went off to his swim lessons and she gave me mean looks the rest of the afternoon. Ugg, well as these people worry about sparkling tiles in the locker room and the age of Mothers, I am thinking of clever little cheap crafts and projects for my son, budget meals for the family, when will I get to that pile of laundry?? It must be so hard to be rich..... they truly have to create things to create drama about, or to judge people on, just to keep there minds busy. Well, I am fine keeping my mind busy on real life, I think it suits me just fine.